The Day I Shit Myself
Roadman today I want to talk about the time I shit myself. Let's cue that intro! The big question is this. How do we use cycling as a tool to improve our health, our happiness and our long changes? That is the question and this podcast will give you the answers. My name is Anthony Walsh and welcome to the Roadman Podcast. Roadman, welcome back to another Roadman cycling podcast as you may have guessed from the title of this podcast. Today I'm going to tell you a story about when I shit myself. And this isn't a crude story for the sake of a crude story, there is a moral to this, but I would say it is quite crude and quite explicit and involves quite an amount of a violent diarrhea. So if you're currently eating your breakfast or eating your lunch, I suggest you press pause on the podcast, consume your lunch, and then resume the podcast. That's just a little bit of an ethicist, disclaimer from me. Before I jump in to telling you this chronically embarrassing story, which will know they would haunt me for the rest of my days, let me just remind you about Patreon. Patreon is how I'm able to bring this Both a resmued audio on the new Roadcaster Pro, tell we have these massive plans for the podcast. This year, some crazy guests, including Andre Greipel coming up in the next month. We're gonna expand the video format plus loads, loads more. That's all possible cause the generosity of some of the listeners on Patreon. Now, some of you guys can't afford it. Some of you are unemployed and that's totally fine. You get to listen for free. But if you can afford it, if you can afford to buy me the price of a beer once a month, please head on over to patreon.com. It's patreon.com forward slash Anthony underscore watch buying me the price of a point to bear once a month and in return you're gonna get access to our secret podcast once a week. That's gonna be dropping on Wednesday. So I got a message a couple of days ago and it was from a client that I'm coaching and it's a new client under starting a training plan. And at the start of the training plan I haven't gone through kind of a battery of testing. So, yeah, so we test at the beginning, we test threshold power, then we test five minute power, one minute power and 10 second power. And by having these sort of key performance indicators, these are a line in the sand, and then each of the training blocks will look to target a specific response. So we'll head into a four week training block where we focus on sprinting as our key performance indicator. So we'll benchmark against the initial test and then we'll look for improvement. So he went into do this test, but like anyone who's a little bit hungry and a little bit motivated, we've probably experienced this ourselves heading off to a new race, decided to try something new. And because he tried something new, he had a massive gas drop for the entire test and totally underperformed, barely made it to the bathroom on time. But it brought me back to a story where I didn't quite make it to the bathroom on time. I was riding for Apple Jay Super U of French team and I was back home and I was out in the Wicklow mountains and I would try to a new high five energy drink and I can still remember exactly what I was wearing. I was wearing my blue Apple Jay Tights and I was so pumped because it was the first time I had a full length set of tights that weren't a short leg warmer combo and they had the little wrapper a bit under the ankle and I thought that was so pro. So my lovely apple jay tights on, I'm out in Wicklow, I knew how you'd have to drink and it's not sitting brilliant. It really isn't sitting brilliant. So I stopped using a bathroom in a bar, no problems, well plenty of problems but you know, no, we won't elaborate on that, just into the bathroom, else. But I was on the way home and I got to about 15 minutes from my house and not a lot of stopping places in that 15 minutes and I felt my stomach gone wool. It's like this isn't good. This is not good at all. And so it started getting increasingly desperate as the kilometers ticked down. And as I got to sort of 400 meters, I was standing in my parents' house down, I was just back from France. As I got to about 400 meters of my parents' house, I was like, this is gonna be close. This is gonna be mission critical. So I was going up the road and I was probably doing, you know, 600 watts, it was a panic. But I had no hands on the bars. So I'm trying to strip off my gile. I'm trying to strip off my long sleeve zip up jacket and my jersey, get all the zips out of the way because I knew time was going to be crucial. Put the key in the door of my parents house, I'm literally running, struggling for traction with the cleats on my cycling shoes on the wooden floors, I get into the toils in the kitchen and I was like, boom, it's too late. It was just scutter inside my beautiful blue apple jay cycling shorts. It's the only time I've ever shipped myself and I'm not proud of a port. I'm sharing this story as a cautionary tale that it can happen. Even the best of us when we experiment with new nutrition products and we mix their caffeine with sugar, with adrenaline, it's just a bad, bad mix. Those tights were never the same again and yesterday I had a podcast talking about how I'm giving away all my free case. I won't be giving away those tights unfortunately because those tights, they never made it back into circulation. I'd never even had the heart to tell anyone, my parents anything, what happened that day? So instead, I toyed a knot in the bottom of the tights, put them inside a plastic bag and I dumped them outside like a discard baby's nappy. They wreaked and ponged until the bin man eventually tucked that bin away. There's been some highlights on this podcast and there's been some lowlights. That is definitely a lowlight. Roadman, I'm back tomorrow with another amazing guest interview and there'll be no talk of shitting myself from here on in. But do not experiment with nutrition products on race or threshold testing day. Chatea tomorrow Roadman. Roadman, before you rush off, I want to mention something completely new. We've recently just formed the new Roadman Cycling Club. So there's two elements to this club. One, it's a virtual club. You can join it anywhere in the world. And two, it's an in-person club based in Ireland. So if you're a racing cyclist in Ireland, then you're looking for a team to race in the colours of next season. If you're looking to hang out with some amazing people and do group rides on the weekend, go and check it out. It's roadmancycling.com forward slash roadmancc. The link is in the show notes. Hope you can join us as part of the new Roman cycling club.